I went to school today and I saw part time students clustered around the department result board. I noticed their reactions, expressions and body language and this motivated me to induce it into writing
These acts/reactions are not only peculiar to my school students but also a generality/larger percent of other students across our tertiary institutions
Now let’s see if you would see a part of yourself doing these
10 Ways Every Nigerian Student Reacts After Checking His/Her Semester Result
1. They Refer To A Lecturer As Being Mean
After checking their semester results, they amazingly keep their mouths widely opened like someone who lost his Bet9ja ticket. They will analyze how cheap the questions were; how they finished before time; and how they attempted all the questions correctly. They will blame their lecturers saying they barely crown the effort of students no matter how they answer their questions correctly, if not, they ought to have been graded “A”
2. They Leap Praises On Themselves
Just because they were fortunate to hit high scores while others didn’t, these ones will be walk-bouncing and parading the class, raising shoulders and praising themselves just to intimidate others that did not perform so well
3. They Start Crying
I observe that guys barely cry after checking their results, but the ladies deserve a standing ovation for this. After checking their results, they will place their hands on their heads crying and sweating profusely as if they just lost a relative. They will keep checking every five minutes expecting their grades to change miraculously
4. They Put Blame Invigilators
These ones will always blame their failure or low grades on the strict invigilators who prevented them from girraf-ing, or communicating with their friends, and/or insufficient time. if not, they ought to have scored at least a/an “A” or “B”. When they score “D or F”, they will say, so this man gave me D despite what I wrote; but when they score “A”, they will say that is what they deserve
5. They Will Cross Out Their Names
These ones will check their results and would act like they have passed but will come back later at night to cancel their names and grades
6. “Thank God I Did Not Carry The Course” Crew
These ones will go straight to d end of their results to see if there is any carry over before even checking grades proper. You will see them go on their knees saying ope ooo !!! Thank God say this man give me LET MY PEOPLE GO
7. They Check The Grades Of Other Students
The ones might have crammed the matric numbers of most students must while some might have even compiled the list of all students in a piece of paper and will bring it along with them when result is released. You will see them come under the disguise of checking their results, when if fact, they are checking that of other students.
8. They Console Others
These ones will check their results without even saying anything. Either they fail or pass, no one knows.
You will see them consoling their colleges who have failed.
9. They Stay Miles Away From The Result Board
They will come and stay few miles away from the board waiting for other students to vacate the board before they check theirs. This is because they are not sure of themselves and they don’t want the breeze to expose the anus of the fowl
10. Feel free to add the last one….